Lol! How many of us actually agree with this? And the answer is probably going to be, all of us! We might not want to admit it but this picture is funny because most of us look at it and think, " hmm, wait a minute! That's exactly what I was thinking right now" Oh the source of the pic is a friend's wall on Facebook btw.
Now, here's the theory. Maybe we were being unrealistic when we first decided to pick someone we like after all. Maybe there is a certain age old wisdom underlying the whole, arranged marriage thing. Whow knows our needs better than our parents? So why not let them pick. At least I'm not gettting my heart plucked out mercilessly stomped upon and then returned to me in a state where I wish it would stop working rather than painfully dragging on through what remains of life.
And then again one thinks how unromantic! really you could not find one person. Or maybe it's just I stopped trusting people after the first one. Now when I even think of a guy, i'm so sure he's gonna leave me that I don't want to go down that path again. Maybe it's me coming to terms with reality, something my brother says will help me figure life out. Figure out who you are and then accordingly try to match it. But one's always partial to oneself. So I think I'm a million times smarter than I really am and a lot prettier too, which is a bit of a question really cos I think the max I pass off is cute or attractive in reality. But then again I'm hoping the adage beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder is really true. And if Swati happens to read this, I'm going to get a nice kick on my ass. But, here's the logic, if I were to do a realistic evaluation I would probably know what range I fit in, thereby ensuring I don't over-reach right?
There's another angle to it too. Why do I have to think about the one I fall in love with? Why does he have to be a certain age, certain qualification, certain family, certain, I don't know economic strata? Obviously i'm not gonna say pick a beggar off the street but what if there is someone who does'nt fit the mould and yet you wish it was him. Just because he makes you feel safe and secure and you trust him. At the end of the day if I need to spend my life with someone is'nt that more important? So should the heart then be let loose without the mind's control to just come to it's own conclusions? Would that require a certain amount of detachment and keeping a reality check too since if it does'nt work, it really should not affect me.
A friend of mine gave me an interesting analysis, disconnected with the above discussion of course. This was when I had my breakup. There are three scenarios,
a) the girl loves the boy more: this will never work, cos the girl will put him up on some pedestal he does'nt deserve to be on and then he is sure to leave cos guys are dogs and they are always looking for the meatier bone
b) they both love each other equally: most likely to occur from an arranged marriage I guess b'cos both of you don't know each other and are trying to figure it out and know you are stuck together anyways so might as well make the most of it. I find them such a compromise, I wish I did'nt really I do but I can't bring myself to be so practical about something so, or which I hope is so romantic
c) the guy loves the girl more: This has the highest probability of success because usually girls prefer being with one guy and if the dude meets the basic requirements then it can be worked out. In fact I've seen it work for most of my friends who have married their boyfriends.
But the thing with situation c is, is'nt it manipulating the guy? Are'nt you pretending to be happy or stopping the lookout because it's more convenient for you? I think a and c are essentially the same with the only exception being the gender. If the girl in c is more like a guy ( I hope you get the drift ) then she is as liklely to break the poor guy's heart as the guy in a would break the girl's heart there. So is it all just a big lie? Does love not exist? Do we just decide that this is the point in my life where I want to settle down and then the person you are with at that point of time is the right person( i'm pretty sure this thought has come from some romantic comedy I watched, I can't recall which one though).
Anyways, like many of my questions I've left this one unanswered and more jumbled up too. It's a libran thing I think:P
p.s.: I am not in a relationship, hoping to get in one, getting married or seeing guys to get into an arranged marriage. These were the thoughts that came to my mind when I saw the pic and I put them down. I know how people jump to conclusions when they read such things and hence the rather lengthy disclaimer. Besides if any of the above were happening I would have been more inclined towards believing love exists and you would have known by the mood of my posts. So don't ask me stupid questions here or over the phone. :D
Now, here's the theory. Maybe we were being unrealistic when we first decided to pick someone we like after all. Maybe there is a certain age old wisdom underlying the whole, arranged marriage thing. Whow knows our needs better than our parents? So why not let them pick. At least I'm not gettting my heart plucked out mercilessly stomped upon and then returned to me in a state where I wish it would stop working rather than painfully dragging on through what remains of life.
And then again one thinks how unromantic! really you could not find one person. Or maybe it's just I stopped trusting people after the first one. Now when I even think of a guy, i'm so sure he's gonna leave me that I don't want to go down that path again. Maybe it's me coming to terms with reality, something my brother says will help me figure life out. Figure out who you are and then accordingly try to match it. But one's always partial to oneself. So I think I'm a million times smarter than I really am and a lot prettier too, which is a bit of a question really cos I think the max I pass off is cute or attractive in reality. But then again I'm hoping the adage beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder is really true. And if Swati happens to read this, I'm going to get a nice kick on my ass. But, here's the logic, if I were to do a realistic evaluation I would probably know what range I fit in, thereby ensuring I don't over-reach right?
There's another angle to it too. Why do I have to think about the one I fall in love with? Why does he have to be a certain age, certain qualification, certain family, certain, I don't know economic strata? Obviously i'm not gonna say pick a beggar off the street but what if there is someone who does'nt fit the mould and yet you wish it was him. Just because he makes you feel safe and secure and you trust him. At the end of the day if I need to spend my life with someone is'nt that more important? So should the heart then be let loose without the mind's control to just come to it's own conclusions? Would that require a certain amount of detachment and keeping a reality check too since if it does'nt work, it really should not affect me.
A friend of mine gave me an interesting analysis, disconnected with the above discussion of course. This was when I had my breakup. There are three scenarios,
a) the girl loves the boy more: this will never work, cos the girl will put him up on some pedestal he does'nt deserve to be on and then he is sure to leave cos guys are dogs and they are always looking for the meatier bone
b) they both love each other equally: most likely to occur from an arranged marriage I guess b'cos both of you don't know each other and are trying to figure it out and know you are stuck together anyways so might as well make the most of it. I find them such a compromise, I wish I did'nt really I do but I can't bring myself to be so practical about something so, or which I hope is so romantic
c) the guy loves the girl more: This has the highest probability of success because usually girls prefer being with one guy and if the dude meets the basic requirements then it can be worked out. In fact I've seen it work for most of my friends who have married their boyfriends.
But the thing with situation c is, is'nt it manipulating the guy? Are'nt you pretending to be happy or stopping the lookout because it's more convenient for you? I think a and c are essentially the same with the only exception being the gender. If the girl in c is more like a guy ( I hope you get the drift ) then she is as liklely to break the poor guy's heart as the guy in a would break the girl's heart there. So is it all just a big lie? Does love not exist? Do we just decide that this is the point in my life where I want to settle down and then the person you are with at that point of time is the right person( i'm pretty sure this thought has come from some romantic comedy I watched, I can't recall which one though).
Anyways, like many of my questions I've left this one unanswered and more jumbled up too. It's a libran thing I think:P
p.s.: I am not in a relationship, hoping to get in one, getting married or seeing guys to get into an arranged marriage. These were the thoughts that came to my mind when I saw the pic and I put them down. I know how people jump to conclusions when they read such things and hence the rather lengthy disclaimer. Besides if any of the above were happening I would have been more inclined towards believing love exists and you would have known by the mood of my posts. So don't ask me stupid questions here or over the phone. :D
2 comments:
Seems a whole case analysis had been done ,with all business clauses ,conditions and aftereffects to write this post :) :)
haha! ya loads of free time on my hands:P
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