Losing a Friend.

Past and gone
Yet always known
Always felt
Not necessarily missed
But at times, wished.
Wished things had been different
Maybe wished Id never changed my mind
That only friends we'd remained
But why over spilt milk
Should I cry

It's true-
we made better friends than anything more
What pushes us then to hope and pray
why must one's best friend be one's mate?
I miss the friend!
Suddenly tumble on memories old
Remember a kind word or comment left
A small compliment maybe to feel it was true.

And then I miss the friend
I see you struggle with it too
Fate so cruel to have us placed
Not in the same city alone, but in the same sphere
We come face to face
And avert our eyes
One in anger the other in shame
But both are left grasping for that time

That time when we spoke for hours on end
Took walks and wished never to part
All our friendship out of the window gone
no ways to undo the events of the past.
I wish we could speak again
You try to speak but it's not the same
I feel you're trying to make amends
Or out of forced will you take the time

Wish it were'nt so
Makes me wonder where the "true friend" went
Or did i misread the signs as always
was being just friends never your intent?
Did you string me along and- did I blindly believe
Why are'nt things more black and white?
Grey's confuse me- I then believe what I like
And before I realise, it's too late
I've also lost what I thought was mine.

Long time, but Im back now

So the net connection at my place was shaky, for the last 2 months and hence I was not able to post anything. Got a datacard yesterday finally and im so excited that I have the net again :P Though most people will be like really, she took 2 months to get a datacard. And for that I have only one brilliant friend of mine to thank. So this dude told me that he would be getting a datacard issued from the company and I could take his personal one so I dont have to invest too much. I gladly agreed cos honestly it would just have been a waste of money. Now later that week, I had a word about my internet problems with my RM and he very nicely said drop me an email and I will have one issued to you. But that stupid friend of mine went and threw a huge tantrum about how I should not have done that when he had said he was going to lend me his datacard. And so I didnt drop a mail asking for one to be issued from the office. And then this brilliant friend of mine, his datacard took forever to arrive, by the time it did arrive, he went off on leave for 3 weeks, then he came back and was messed up cos his girlfriend is breaking up with him and then finally got off his ass and went and collected the datacard from the office and handed over his to me... So that is why I took two months to get internet connection, something that can be done in one day's time. Anyways, now that I have it, you will see a whole lot more activity from me over here, I promise. And now time to get ready and go to work.  I will catch you guys later with a more sensible post soon i hope.

Under Attack

And you may think I'm talking war,
But to think so simply helps not my cause
For external affaris are all thought of
What no one pays heed to are internal faults.

A girl gets stripped of all her decency and more
You may say this is a known ill
But that it takes the most barbaric force
For us to take note,, is this not us under seige?

Basic rights violated, Basic needs ignored
All our morals flushed down the drain
And we live with the mentality of survival of the best
We survived today, the one hurt was someone else
Such apathy, such mistrust in fate

For we seem to believe
it would never be us,
It happens to the careless, it happens to those who provoke!!
It happens to people who take risks unknown.

And so people mourn the dead
protest, show anger and say the right things
while keeping these thoughts in their heads
I say one thing people, you are no safe.

These criminals lurk within the safety of these false concepts
It's not the external measures but what out society promotes and fosters that protects.
So teach your kids values, every little effort helps
Tell them right from wrong and pray your neighbour does the same
We are no longer at most harm from outside
Its our society, beliefs,customs under attack from within

What are you going to do about it?

And I mean this in the most constructive way possible. The poor Delhi girl who suffered one of the most heinous gang-rapes known to mankind, finally died today. While it saddens me that I take the stand of thank god it's over, I also know it's the most practical thing. Forget the trauma she would have had to face, the fact that her intestines and vagina would have to be replaced would have made life physically painful for her too. For those out of the loop, a girl was gang-raped by a group of men in a Delhi bus and then the messed around with an iron rod and managed to pull out her intestines too. And this gut wrenching description is actually one of the least morbid ones I could possibly give of the incident so you can well imagine how horrific the tale is. The poor girl struggled to survive, but finally she is dead today. And I see protest marches and angry messages and updates. But like everything else, I know it is just something people are doing in the moment, that it leading to something really substantial is near impossible

I see rants to the government and security. But honestly are you sayign that a law passed by the government is going to put an end to this? In a society where women are not respected in their own houses, and where the male to female population is seriously skewed, this leaves me feeling very hopeless about the situation. However, if anyone is really looking for a solution, here goes

1) Equal treatment of the genders. This starts from curbing female foeticide. For heaven's sake, you killing a girl before she is even born is the same if not worse than girls being abused and left for dead and finally succumbing to their injuries. It preaches a mentality that women are not of any value. Why would your sons pay attention or respect to girls like they deserve then?

2) Equal opportunities to girls. You will send your sons to all the fancy schools and parties and outings. And they are allowed to stay out late and date girls etc. They are allowed to wear and act and do as they please. But not girls. And for heavens sake, our dressign doesnt provoke men. Its the animal instinct and the fact that they see a vulnerable and helpless prey in front of them that does. So stuff your preaching about dress decently up your ass. Give equal opportunities to women and it will increase the acceptance of girls in all aspects of society more and make them less of an enticement to the perverts that exist

3) Be a pro-active society. There has been an incident when walking on the streets of Mumbai, I yelled at a guy who tried to brush past my friend while we were walking on the road in the night, and the guy ran for his life cos the shopkeepers nearby came out. Delhi, and unfortunately now even mumbai to some extent is losing this pro-activeness. However if societies promise to protect its own that area becomes safe and this can spread as a mutually agreed upon solution if taken seriously.

So we don't need the government to put up a law to deter these incidents. We need good educated societies. And anger is fine but what's more important is where it is directed and what comes out of it. We are not looking for a quick fix here, finding and hanging the guilty is not enough, we need a permanent fix and that can only come through us. So I again ask you, what are you going to do about it?

Not sure what to name this

So I recently attended my best friend's sisters wedding in Mumbai. And as expected with all indian weddigns everythign was pure chaos. I am yet to see a well organised and disciplined indian wedding. So much so that after my big fat greek wedding i wondered what the whole hullabaloo was about. Anyways, that being not what I set out to write about, I will get straight down to my latest eureka moment(Yes I had one more of those)

"You threaten to leave only those who you know can't do without you"

And its one of the most heartless selfish thing you can do. There's a weird sadistic pleasure one gets from seeing the person in front of you getting all emotional and look at you pleadingly. And its horrible. And I know this because this is exactly what I did. And then I felt super bad about it. Because I knew it wasnt my friends fault and she had other commitments. But I was mad. And I knew it was her fault to some extent for not having planned it better and for letting me down by not having enough time for me especially since i came back home after 3 months. And so i told her this is the last time Im going to see you for a very very long time so hope you enjoyed it and walked off. And then I felt very bad about it and realised that had she not put me in a position where I could tell her this and not worry about retaliation or to hell with you attitude I would never have said it. And hence the above quote about threatening to leave only those who cant do without you. Another one of my sad observations on behaviour I guess.

Fav Pic

That has to be my favourite pic from IIFT. Minal and Neha kissing me to try and cheer me up because some guys had been very mean to me after the symposium. Though now I get the point that boys being boys have the tendency to just go jump into things without thinking abt the niceties to be followed... but this is my favourite pic more because of the simplicity of thinking. Apparently for my friends just them being around me and giving me a peck on the cheek and a hug is supposed to cheer me up.. And I think its quite true too...Theres nothing that picks you up better than people just showing you they are there for in the simplest term possible . It gives you the courage to believe that whatever past doesnt matter cos the ppl who care abt u still do and will always continue to do so..

Snob

They will not talk to her


They do look at her

They wonder who she is and where she comes from

A stranger in her own land

Sometimes a curse and sometimes a boon



She sits quietly with her lunch

Her back to them all

She is tired of the constant gazes and curious eyes she sees

She wants none of it today



Her friends are on leave

Hence she feels the eyes even more

She tries to not think about them

But its easier with company on her hand



They finally guess she’s just alone

They also make a conjecture on her character

Quite the snob they think let her be

We have plenty without her you see



She wishes they would’nt judge her so

That her differences are more of accents and lisps than pride

That she’s just normal and one of them all

But the constant speculation puts her off

She would rather not explain herself anymore

Why must she fight for acceptance with every single soul?

Had she been just the same would they have cared

But now a snob have they her named



So she sits quietly with her back to them

Blocking out the sounds of friendly laughter and cheer

Wishing there was someone she knew

Who would in this vast unfriendly world make her feel at home.